Wrapping up the Weekend

It was a fabulous weekend and as we head into March, I think of the precious weeks ahead before a scheduled May deployment. H's only been home for six months and already we have to begin the preparation to say goodbye again.

Tonight at our couples bible study our prayer request was for guidance for the timing of fertility treatments. Technically we can begin in about two weeks (two weeks!!) but I get nervous with the timetable. If we are blessed and become pregnant within the first cycle or two of treatments, it would put us weeks within H arriving home from Iraq. I do not want to have another baby by myself-once was enough.

Sometimes I feel like it is hard to discern what is God's will and what is our free will. God has so obviously placed this desire on our hearts but then life gets in the way. Sometimes I have a hard time just wrapping my mind around spending another half a year without my best friend......And then I think of all of the time lost not pushing ahead and want to let God work out the details.

God, I know you are sovereign and in complete control. I just need another reminder because I place so much importance on my timing. Your will, not mine. More of you, less of me.