New Features at Amazing Grace

I just wanted to point out some new features here that will help you navigate your way around this blog. Please notice that I have added a button for Faith Deployed which will direct you to Jocelyn Green's amazing site offering support and encouragement to military families-especially those going through deployment.  Articles and devotionals can be found under the "blog" header.

You can now subscribe to Amazing Grace! Don't miss out on updates and posts.  I will be linking articles from Faith Deployed and Wives in Bloom to this blog for one stop reading!

Lastly, I have added a search function to make it a bit less time consuming to view posts by topic. If you are a prospective adoptive parent or are in the process of traveling to your child, please use keyword "travel" or "Thailand" for our travel experience to Prim. Any attachment related topics can be found by typing in "adjustment" or "attachment". 

On a more personal note, please keep our men and women in the armed forces in your prayers. Although "combat missions" in Iraq have ended, sailors, soldiers and marines deployed to Iraq still face hostility and danger on a daily basis as violence increases. The Administration's claim that our role is strictly one of support has not deterred terrorists from targeting our military, Iraqi security forces and civilians.
In the past four days 21 US soldiers have been killed in Afghanistan. Please pray for God's protection over all of those serving in a country covered in darkness and especially for those families who will never see their loved ones again.

Come Join Me!

So writing is my thing. I love it and it's taken a long time to get to a place where I feel like I'm "good enough" to do it professionally.  Freelancing, especially online, has been such an amazing opportunity to expand my horizons and write about what is near and dear to my heart. 

Right now I have the pleasure and honor of writing for Faith Deployed and will be a regular contributor to the new online magazine Wives in Bloom (debuting September 1 and is a part of Christian Military Wives). This is new for me and will take time away from this blog but God is prodding me to do more outside of my safety net, which is all of you who love me and my yammering!  So if you only see a post or two a week here, know that I'm working hard on new endeavors but still want to advocate and write about adoption and our family.

A while back I did a marriage series on this blog and it is being posted at Faith Deployed. You can check it out here and part 2 will follow shortly!
If you are a military spouse or have a loved one serving in the armed forces than both of these online sites are not only encouraging but supportive!

Wordless Weekend

A Repost: Resistence is Futile

As this months marks the three year anniversary of Prim's homecoming, I have been reflecting on all that we have endured. One thing that I love about my husband is that he always manages to make me smile-even when we feel like we are in the depths of despair (to quote Anne Shirley).  
On one particular night in Thailand, shortly after Prim came into our care full time, our little one collapsed from exhuastion on my chest and any attempt to move her was met with angry tears. Thankfully, H took over my writing duties and posted this from our hotel in Bangkok:

I am Prim and I am being oppressed by an international triad. An Asian man whom I believe to be the leader, though I have doubts because the Puerto-Rican looking lady gives him a lot of orders and a little boy, who's pretty easy on the eyes. I am not sure what country they are from because the man and woman speak to each other in English, but the man and the boy speak to each other in French, and the man speaks under his breath about the lady in what I think is Vietnamese. When the little boy watches a show about a girl and her monkey friend, I thought I heard him say something in Spanish...I am soooo confused.
But I digress... I was able to steal a minute alone by making cute faces. Now they are scurrying for their precious cameras to take ransom photos of me. I am typing on this white machine that belongs to the woman which the man doesn't like because it's not a PC but something called a Mac. Today they took me to their embassy to get my legal documents so they could take me to their basecamp. After that, we went to the river and went on a boat ride. Apparently the man chose poorly, because he picked the slowest boat in the canal. I tried to flag down everyone I saw, but they just thought I was being cute and waved back. After what seemed like a eternity, we hit land and stopped at this hole in the wall where they tried to shove food down my throat. I was so excited when we got to the King's Palace because surely he would stop these people from showering me with love, but he wasn't home. Then it started thundering and lightning so we jumped in a taxi and sat in traffic for an hour and a half. The man left the taxi at the embassy and sent us to their hotel, but somehow when we finally got there, he was already there waiting. He must have teleporting abilities like the guy on the television show "Heroes".
They didn't want to risk having me escape like last night so they had food brought to the room. I tried to gross the woman out by dipping my french fries into her ketchup, licking it clean and putting the french fries back into the pile. But again I failed because they just thought I was simply adorable (which I am). Tonight, I'll fall asleep on the woman again, because she has nice built-in pillows, whereas the man is uncomfortable because his chest is like finely chiseled stone and his arms are like twisted steel. I am starting to warm up to him though, because he's pretty nice and he makes me laugh. Tomorrow, they are taking me to this place called Hua Hin. Wish me luck.

This Almost Gave Me a Hernia

วันแม่แห่งชาติ

 

Happy Mother's Day to a girl far away from here.  I am watching our daughter play with her new Barbie right now, deep in concentration as she combs the long blond hair just so.  She is growing into such a big girl, you wouldn't believe how much she resembles you.  Especially those feet. 

Oh those feet! Every time I look at them, tickle them, marvel at their stomping power I think of you.  I remember when we received the first picture of our little girl, I took one look at those long feet that ended in longer toes and I thought to myself surely they are the biggest and ugliest feet on a child I had ever seen.  And sure enough, the shoes that I had so carefully chosen, packed and carried thousands of miles across the ocean did not fit those toddler feet. 

We are blessed to have two pictures of you holding our baby.  She was only a month old, you a child yourself, and what struck me first was your somber face.  What you must have been thinking while you stood there in front of a camera to document the day you let her go.  After looking at your face and trying to discern the expression in your eyes I quickly moved to the bottom of the picture and gasped as I thought, "My gosh! Those feet!!".   I remember that it made me smile.  I love that she will one day look at this picture of you two together and think that she has feet just like yours.  That she shares something so pronounced with her mother.

Our daughter is beautiful.  She had the biggest brown eyes, the sweetest smile and this little athletic body all carried by my favorite part of her.  Her feet.  I pray one day these feet will carry her toward her dream.  I pray that the feet that mirror yours will direct her towards a peace and faith in God and eventually a family of her own.

And maybe one day, those feet will carry her back to you....

It All Comes To This

Far Away From Here

Do you ever get a deep yearning to just be... away?  For quite some time I have settled into the same daydream.  A little house, lots of open space and the sound of the kids laughing.  In my daydream my belly is swollen with pregnancy and H is beside me on a creaking porch swing.  It is quiet in all of the right ways.  Nature makes it's noises and we spend our evenings quietly enjoying what God has made.

I think I may be entering a new season in my life.  I crave simple.  I long for quiet.  I think much of it has to do with H being gone.  I am starting to realize that I have spent too much of my marriage apart from my husband.  I want to know what it is to be with him, not without.  The kids are growing so fast-I can't seem to remember little things about them when they were babies.  The other day I wrangled with the cloudy memory of when G took his first steps and I hated that I couldn't remember clearly that precious moment. 

Prim came home at twenty one months and just recently I realized how small she was.  I feel like I missed so much of her toddler time because it was so deeply emotional and exhausting for us all.  I wish for her that I had been able to carry her as an infant.  As an adoptive mom I feel like I missed so much-that I should have had the joy of her first tooth and her first steps. 

Maybe what I need is to feel shut away for a while with all of us together again.  The time is slipping, slipping away so quickly and soon they will be stretching their wings to find their own way. 

On My Mind

How is it possible that praying can be so utterly disappointing?

Today is my Honey's 39th birthday and we are apart-again...

Why do they call it a "cluster" class for gifted and talented when all it is is a regular 2nd grade class visited by the G&T resource teacher once a week. Great.  They can be gifted and talented. Once a week.

How God can be described with words that are not applicable to ourselves such as unconditional, faithful, omniscient, merciful.

Why do I procrastinate? Really. Why? Even I think it's painful.

I am so thankful for good friends. What would I do without you guys?

Why can't hair extensions be cheaper? I really want long, thick luscious movie star hair.